Reflections

Well, here it is the middle of June, and a big day for me and my parents who today have enjoyed that status for the past fifty years. Whew! Time does fly when you are having fun! It seems like just a few years ago that I was a young kid, and most days I still feel pretty much like a kid. I want to be live a life like my grandmother, still rocking and rolling at 90. Here is a picture of my celebration at Renell's!

To all of you who have been so supportive with email, calls, and attention while I have been in a BMW (bitch, moan, whine) funk for the past few weeks, or maybe its been months, thank you all for your support. I think more than anything I was surprised by how I felt about this recent journey when it actually came to happen. Like many things, the whole Peace Corps process prior to actually coming to Moldova was a "hurry up and wait" kind of thing. I waited for months to actually get invited, and then once invited, felt like I just didn't have quite enough time to wrap up all the details that needed to get done. I was so focused on wrapping things up at work, and with the houses, that I don't know that I really took the time before I left to prepare myself emotionally to "let go". The first two and a half months of training were so packed, and the past month has been so much slower, I am feeling like I am just now able to spend some time on the emotional processes of enjoying myself, and remembering why the Peace Corps matters to me.

So here it is, and if you have heard me on this soapbox before, please skip the following:

This journey has been something that I have thought about for many years, since being a teenager and hearing the Katter's talk about their Peace Corps adventures in Africa in the late '60's. I have always loved travel, language, culture. But really, it has always been less about what I want, and what I think is important in life. Service is important, responsibility is important, loyalty is important, fidelity is important, and peace is important. For me, the decision to apply at the time that I did was driven by the national political stance that did not agree with my personal pacifist stance. I think it is important that Americans are seen as good, peaceful, and productive members of the world community, and not interested only in world domination and war. This is not a comment on American international politics as much as it is about my belief that if you are not a part of the solution, then maybe you are a part of the problem, and a personal need to act in response to the state of the world. I want to make a difference. I know I will meet people here who have never met an American before, and I want that experience to be a positive one for them, and for me. I am proud to be an American, and this experience has reinforced that pride. I don't feel that pride in a boastful way, but as a gift of my family, and home and community, in a grateful way. I have been really blessed my whole life to have had the love and support of family and friends who have given me so much. I have always wanted to share those blessings with others who may not have had the same good fortune that I have had.

This past week, volunteers were asked to complete the Biennial Volunteer Survey. The questions were mostly about volunteer satisfaction, and among them was the question of whether you would recommend the Peace Corps experience to others. I absolutely would. My struggles here have been of a personal nature and not reflective in any way of any issue with the Peace Corps. I have been impressed by the level of support, leadership and infrastructure that is PC Moldova.

So, now I think I am moving out of the funk and into the real work. I am excited and ready. This past week I went to Chisinau on Thursday with my partner and gave a VERY brief speech in Romanian. My fellow volunteer, Rian, who had a little more lead time, and had a phenomenal powerpoint presentation, and a speech written out, but I did okay with "winging"it. Not impressive, but I went and did my best under the circumstances. Plus, I went to the PC office and had 2 packages! Thanks Mom and Dad, Bob and Kim! You guys made my day! Today, Renell had a gathering at her place, tacos and birthday cake. It was a good day. Monday I am back in Chisinau for my first VAC meeting. It is always a long day going into Chisinau, so tomorrow I'll just relax. Happy Father's Day to my Dad, and to all the dad's out there who read this. I miss you, and hope you know how much your support has meant to me all these years. Love ya, Jami