Dreams and schemes

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Location: Brunswick, ME, United States

I am fun-loving, a dreamer, but not much of a schemer. I try always to be a good friend, and a good mother, daughter and sister. I am a hard worker, and I like to work hard and also to have a good time. I am serving in the Peace Corps, in Moldova, and the insight and opinions in this blog are mine, and do not reflect the opinions of the US government or the Peace Corps. "I cannot do great things. I can only do small things with great love."

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Missing Linnea

Linnea moved out of Brunswick and back to Reading last Monday, 5/21. She stayed with Kristen for the first few days, and then I drove down to see her on Friday. This was not as easy a week as I am making it sound today, a week and a half later. The house was not really habitable, and it has taken some effort and money to begin to make it feel like a home for her.

My drive down on the Friday of Memorial Day week-end was surprisingly not memorable, just lots of traffic, but overall it was uneventful, with the exception of my bout of Pinkeye. Saturday and Sunday both were spent painting, cleaning, visiting, shopping for paint, and appliances, and more housework. The bright spots to the weekend were visiting with Brenda, Larry, Dale, Bob, Donna, and Bobbi and Kera. Everone was helpful and polite about how rank we smelled from all of the work and no showers. Thankfully, Brenda and Larry invited us for showers and dinner on Saturday night, and that was very nice. On Sunday we worked in her bedroom all day, and then I left around 6 p.m. and drove back to Brunswick. Monday was a pretty quiet day, and I was pretty wiped out. Yesterday, it was back to work and I felt even more tired. I think it just caught up with me. I left work a little early, and just went home to relax. While I was relaxing, Linnea was getting the plumbing fixed at her house. She can now shower and use the toilet, so that is a good thing. Now, she is waiting for the appliances to be delivered tomorrow and her furniture as soon as we can rent a U-Haul to move her bed and other "big" furniture down there. I am sure she is sick of sleeping on the floor.

I am really proud of how hard she is working at this, to make this house her home. It is fraught with memories for both of us. For me the memories are mostly happy ones, from when we were a family, and she was a little girl living there. I think her memories are mixed with adolescent rebellion and grief also, and probably not as overwhelmingly positive. So many people question this decision to live there, but that neighborhood and home still feel pretty comfortable for me. I guess it is the history and memories that make it okay in my mind, even if there is some risk. As she has said, there is risk in everything, and this is an okay way to save some money and pay off some bills. I still worry and miss her all the time.

This afternoon I am heading out to the other Portland (OR) to present at the Federation for Families Conference with Susan and Jeanette. This is different from other conferences that I have presented at, as this is the first time that I am part of a team that is presenting, and that should be fun . Also, this is a different audience, and I am looking forward to seeing who is in the audience. Maybe my friend, Wendy, from PA will be there. It would be nice to see her. In any event, I'm sure it will be a good time.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Testing, testing....

This has been a week for testing...patience, and procedures. As some of you know, I have been interested in going into the Peace Corp, and have been in a deferred status, pending medical tests since March 21. This week was an endoscopy on Monday, a cavity filled Tuesday, more dental work Wednesday, and a B12 shot and pink eye today. I know it is a good thing to take care of yourself, and I am okay with doing all of this, as I would rather be careful now and not have to return home early, as happened to my good friend, Ed. Still, it is a lot. On top of that, Linnea moved to Reading on Monday, and it is not going well for her yet. The house needs a lot of work, and it is hard to figure out the priorities when there is so much to do. I know it probably feels overwhelming, but I know she will do okay there. Tomorrow I am heading down to offer support and to paint, both things that I enjoy. Happy Memorial Day to one and all!

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Hello

Hello and welcome to my newest online adventure! Never having had a blogspot before, and being a great follower of my friends Adrienne and Bobbbi, I decided that today I join the 21st Century (only 7 years late!). So here I sit, without much to say. Today my parents are attending the funeral services for the son of a friend of the family. Chris went of to work last week, and dropped over at work. A huge loss to his family at 47, and a wake-up call to all of us around his age about how precious and short life can be. My thoughts are with his family today, and for all who will miss him daily.
On a more positive note, Linnea will be heading out this week to make her way in Reading. I am excited and nervous as a parent who walks the fine line between support and enabling every day. I know it is scary to set out on your own adventure, but I am so proud of her! As she discovers new friends and old, I hope she always remembers to keep a positive outlook!